Showing posts from August, 2010

Slower traffic means you!

By definition, "slower" means not as fast as something or someone else. It doesn't matter Rocket A travels at 4 times the speed of sound. If Rocket B travels at 5 times the speed of sound, Rocket A is, by definition, the slower of the two rockets.

Therefore, logic would hold that were there an intergallactic road sign that said, "Slower Rockets Keep Right," Rocket B would have a resonable expectation that Rocket A would hauls its slow-moving ass on over and let the big dog pass.

Apparently what's good enough for space travel does not apply to American roadways.

I've reached the end of my rope with people who insist on maintaining their position in the left lane of the two lane highway near our home, regardless of their speed.  If you are driving 50 mph in a 45 mph zone but I'm driving 55, it does not mean that you get to keep your position.  You are -- again, by definition -- slower traffic.  (And, yes...this means mentally slower as well as your dr…

Words never die

The beauty of the oral and written traditions is that they keep alive words and phrases from generation to generation.  In this manner, wisdom is passed from father to son, mother to daughter, grandparent to grandchild.

So what the hell are we supposed to do when phrases from our modern culture should die?

There are dozens of trite, hackneyed phrases that were poignant when they first appeared but through overuse by lazy writers, political pundits, or hopelessly-uncool-people-trying-to-sound-hip, they begin to sound like nothing more than ground glass filtered through a sand-filled ear canal on it's way to the brain.

You know what these are.  There are hundreds of examples of these we hear every day.  "Where's the Beef!"  "You go, Girl!"  "Think outside the box."  They are the result of intellectual retardation and the utter inability or unwillingness to thoughtfully craft the words we use to express our complex thoughts and feelings.

Of course, f…

Welcome to the Smoke House

Thanks for stopping by Where There's Smoke, my blog on topics that likely interest only me.  I'll be tossing out my thoughts as they occur, lest I lose them blowing across the barren wasteland of my mind...

Nothing significant to report now but topics coming soon include:

- Clinton was the first black President...Obama is the first female President...find out why
- "Slower Traffic Keep Right" means YOU!
- Having a bowel movement at the office as a capital offense

Plus I'll post progress on my two book projects and chronicle our process of considering relocation to Lake Mary, Florida.

And remember...where there's smoke, there's cancer...