It's OK

It's OK to ask me about Her.

Don't be concerned that mentioning Her will bring Her to mind and make me sad.

She's never not on my mind. And I'll always be sad that She's gone.

But I'll also always be happy that I had Her in my life. Not just happy...blessed.

I will always think of Her. Every day. Some days, all day. Those days can be really heavy.

But when you ask me about Her, it tells me you cared about Her, me, or both of us. That makes the heavy just a little bit lighter.

On the less heavy days, asking me about Her makes me smile. I think of some silly thing She did that made me laugh. Or some crazy thing She did that made me shake my head. But it always reminds me how fortunate I was to have Her in my life for 27 years.

I don't talk about Her nearly as much as I think about Her. I don't want you to have to feel the heavy.

So even though I talk about Her sometimes, I keep most of it to myself. And that can be a little bit lonely.

But that's OK. She matters so much to me and always will. If you know her, She matters to you differently. And that’s OK.

So it's OK to ask me about Her.

Because when you ask me about Her, it lets me know you cared about Her. Or me. Or both of us.

And it tells me that Her being gone matters to you, too. Then I feel less alone with my thoughts of Her.

And that makes me happy.

And I bet it makes Her happy, too.

Lauren Renee Higginbotham
February 9, 1993 - May 6, 2023



Comments

  1. AnonymousMay 6, 2024 at 6:13 PM

    My sweet sweet Lo. I know what you mean about shaking your head at the crazy things she did lol. She always had the best stories. And that laugh. I wish I could hear it just a couple more times. I would record it and listen to it daily. I do that with a lot of the videos I have of us, just being silly at home. Laughing, making fun of each other, gossiping, getting each other through dumb boys. She was my little sister. I was so protective. She could do no wrong in my eyes. I loved that she valued my advice. And actually put some of it into action. Heaven is a lucky place. Love you guys.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Smokey Joe MayesMay 6, 2024 at 6:54 PM

      Thank you so much for leaving your memories, Anonymoushley. We love you, too. <3

      Delete

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